I have been working and meeting people in Dubai in the past two weeks. I enjoyed the people from many diverse places of birth immensely, particularly their candor - “the quality of being open and honest.”
Is candor the new competitive edge? My answer is candor is definitely a key component of competitive advantage.
Like you, I suspect, I am sick and tired of spin, BS, and double talk. I embrace candor with vigour and enthusiasm. My approach is reciprocated. The rewards are massive.
Here are 21 ways you can be candid. Embrace them in your own way and possibilities you only now dream about will become reality.
#1. Be yourself
As Oscar Wilde famously observed: ““Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
#2. Be transparent and willing to be vulnerable.
#3. Get very, very, very good at communicating what you really mean.
#4. Stop trying to please everyone. Instead do what you love in the service of people who love what you do.
#5. Seize each moment not just each day. A great lesson of life is that we can mess up a moment and immediately in the next moment do better.
#6. Call the shot on people who blame and shame.
#7. Stop making excuses and be accountable,
#8. Appreciate people when they do well and help others to be accountable.
There is a great technique in the vault section of the Changing What’s Normal site.
Go here and scroll down to Sparkenation 47 and download the Appreciation and Accountability technique and start using it today.
#9. Listen with your eyes and your heart and let people know you truly heard them before you share what is on your mind.
#10. Speak your mind only after you have shared from your heart.
#11. Ask for the business or for action. The answer is always no when you fail to ask.
#12. Take full responsibility for your intentions, feelings, thoughts and actions.
Take no responsibility for other people’s intentions, feelings. thoughts and actions.
#13. Be 100% present or leave the room. As Nigel Risner says: “When you’re in the room, be in the room."
#14. If you find yourself taking offence to what others do or don’t do, get over it. You are not responsible for what other people do or don’t do.
#15. If for whatever reason you can’t keep a promise, be honest and upfront about why and tell people.
#16. Changing your mind is your prerogative. Explain truthfully why you have changed your mind and people will embrace you. If they don’t S.U.M.O (Shut Up Move On).
#17. S.U.M.O is a great concept from best selling author Paul McGee. S.U.M.O often.
#18. No and no thank you can be just as empowering as Please and Thank You. Say No and no thank as often as you say the other two.
#19. Do what you fear. “A life lived in fear, is a life half lived.”
#20. Call the shot on people when you feel they are spinning BS to you.
#21. Take the BS Detector Pulse Check here.
You just might be staggered by what it tells and shows you.
As soon as you take this pulse check you will be able to download by ebook 52 actions of the wise. Take an action every week and you will become more candid and stand out from the crowd who are conspicuous by their silence and inaction.
You will also receive a complimentary analysis that will help you as you do your work.
Be the difference you what to see in the world.
PS A warning. Never confuse people with problems.
PSS Two more ways to becoming more candid.
#1. Engage me as your mentor
“A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart,
and plays it back to you when you have forgotten the words.”
I am this kind of friend to a few people each year.
#2. Join a Changing What’s Normal Master-Mind group.